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They may grow agitated, grumpy, or depressed, but given enough time of cutting back and hopefully achieving sobriety, they will emerge happier and healthier. So, when supporting your loved one, it can be beneficial to lead with love, compassion, and understanding. If they’re not receptive, keep trying — and set boundaries to protect your own well-being. Instead, she recommends seeking more formal support with Al-Anon or therapy to help you create boundaries and care for yourself.
We have a proven track record of providing successful addiction treatment at our facility in Palmer Lake, Colorado. Our knowledgeable staff can help advise on the best course of action for your spouse based on their unique situation. High functioning alcoholics can be difficult to identify because, the way they see it, if the world doesn’t see they have a problem, it doesn’t exist. https://ecosoberhouse.com/ In other words, if they’re doing well financially or feel that they are seen as happy and successful, they are fine. High functioning addicts find it difficult to admit that they have a problem, so here are some signs to help you determine whether you or a loved one may be a high-functioning alcoholic. It is hard to find ways to support your functioning alcoholic spouse.
How To Cope When Living With An Alcoholic Spouse
When they’re not under the influence of alcohol, they are often moody, irritable and anxious — all things that can create a lot of tension in an intimate relationship. Dating a functional alcoholic can be fun at first because people who are high-functioning alcoholics tend to be the life of the party. Once you get to really know them, you likely recognize how serious their alcohol dependency is. Here at FHE Health, we are committed to providing treatment not only for alcoholics but also for the people who are closest to them. Spouses can play a vital role in recovery from an alcohol use disorder. Part of that role may include helping your spouse or partner find the treatment they need.
- This includes managing to go to work, supporting a family, having relationships all while heavily drinking almost everyday.
- A person using alcohol beyond moderation can come into conflict with anyone that impedes their drinking habits.
- High functioning addicts find it difficult to admit that they have a problem, so here are some signs to help you determine whether you or a loved one may be a high-functioning alcoholic.
High-functioning alcoholism often arises when someone helps to enable it in another person. For example, the alcoholic may chronically borrow money from a friend or loved one to cover their habit. For others, it takes a years of quiet abuse before the effects start to take place. Some people may appear to have it together while they secretly cope with high functioning alcoholism. Consider not drinking yourself (at least temporarily), says Kennedy. You, too, might realize that your relationship with alcohol is negatively affecting your life.
How to help a high functioning alcoholic?
Even if you are aware that your drinking has become a problem, it’s common to worry about what others might think. In a 2015 study, almost 29% of participants didn’t seek treatment due to stigma or shame. If your loved one is in denial or doesn’t want to seek treatment, they’re not alone. According to the 2019 National Survey on Drug Use and Health,about 14.5 million people have an AUD, and yet only 7% received treatment that year.
The Functional Alcoholic may be highly-skilled, dependably-employed and well-regarded at the office. He probably fits in with the neighbors, enjoys hobbies and looks forward to the future. Physically, besides the perpetual beer can in hand and occasionally red-rimmed eyes, he probably shows no outward signs of addiction. The Functional Alcoholic is probably aware that he drinks more than the average person, but not aware that it’s a problem.
Private Addiction Treatment: Why One-on-One Therapy Works Better for You
High-functioning alcoholism can carry an especially heavy burden because it is easy for someone with this type of alcohol use disorder to live in denial that there is a problem. After all, they think that they are still able to drink while handling their daily responsibilities. Unfortunately, because they don’t believe their drinking is an issue, high-functioning alcoholics may not seek out the help they need. In fact, functional alcoholics are often people who seem to ‘have it all; they maintain a busy social life, work hard at their careers and are often well-liked by their neighbors. These are people who tend to be well-educated and intelligent, and they are most likely in denial about the scope of their drinking problem.
An experienced intervention specialist can help the participants prepare for these reactions so they can respond effectively. Functional tends to refer to someone’s ability to survive in our culture but perhaps not thrive. The functional alcoholic may drive; run the occasional load of laundry; and hold a job. The functional person probably keeps the refrigerator stocked but may not be able to get out of bed in the mornings to make breakfast for the kids. As long as there are good days, income and effort, the functional label persists. A strong possibility for frequent ups and downs, not only in their moods and also in their financial, emotional, and social states.
Solutions to Help the Functional Alcoholic in Your Life
You can educate yourself on and alcohol abuse and alcoholism (Alcohol Use Disorder), how to maintain your wellbeing, and offer support without enabling. It sounds like a manageable list, but it can be terrifying at first. Education, awareness and action are the best ways to help your functioning alcoholic spouse. One of the high functioning alcoholic symptoms is that they tend to use drinking as a coping mechanism.
Functional alcoholics often drink heavily to mask serious mental health issues such as anxiety, an eating disorder or a dissociative identity disorder (formerly known as multiple personality disorder). Go online, look up signs and symptoms of alcoholism and addiction, try to be aware of what is going on if you’re unsure if they have a drinking problem. Substance high functioning alcoholic abuse can blindside you if you have no previous experience with drug and alcohol addiction or alcohol abuse. Arming yourself with the facts about alcohol use disorder and drug addiction is the first part of being able to know what your spouse is going through. There are plenty of websites, support groups, and literature on living with an alcoholic or addict.
Getting Help As a Functional Alcoholic
High functional alcoholics are extremely resistant in recognizing the need for change. In many instances with alcohol use disorder, a person will hit a “rock bottom” where they have no one left to help enable them and no source of income. High-functioning alcoholics rarely reach this bottom and will continue to disregard that a problem exists.
These are people who care about someone in their life who is down on their luck, and just want to help them. Drinking rarely causes them to miss work and other obligations (although it does happen occasionally). They are usually able to manage areas of life including jobs, homes, and families.
Today, healthcare professionals would say that a person has an alcohol use disorder (AUD). What the statistics don’t reveal is how many spouses, partners, boyfriends and girlfriends are impacted when the person they are in an intimate relationship with is an alcoholic. Like all types of addiction, struggles with AUD affect not just the alcoholics themselves, but those who are closest to them. An alcohol abuse problem can include binge drinking, having negative consequences such as hangovers with your drinking but continuing anyway, and drinking despite the desire to stop. The present descriptive study aimed to investigate the problems faced and coping strategies used by the wives of alcoholics. When dating a functioning alcoholic, many signs may be present that can clue you into your partner’s alcohol dependency.